Gray options can be adjusted through negotiation.

Staff member: "I have a child who reads during class. Academic achievement is not a problem. Parents are also taking the stance that we should give him more attention. We are allowing him to read as long as he is doing what he is supposed to be doing, but how should we go about this with other children watching?"

Dr. "Basically, I think that's a good response. However, you should do the thing of negotiating from time to time. A child who is characteristically picky tends to think in terms of two options about his or her desires, whether he or she can or cannot do it. But there are many compromises and options out there. Why don't you try to be good for 00, but hold back for 00? Through negotiation with teachers in the form of "I'm good at 00, but why don't you hold out for 00?", we learn that there are such gray options in the world. Through negotiation with teachers, students learn that there are gray options in the world, and they learn through experience that they can adjust these options through negotiation. Whether we allow or forbid, if we just follow what is decided from the top, we will not be able to learn."

The term is used to refer to the following.

And if that negotiation didn't change the situation all along, that's not a problem.

The objective is not to improve the behavior of "reading books" during this school year, but to develop the idea and ability to negotiate with others around you in order to find a drop-off point with others after middle school.

I didn't have this perspective, so I learned a lot.

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